2019 Opening Day for #F3TheGladiator

AO: The Gladiator

When: 01/03/2019

QIC: Viking

PAX (): Atari, Tebow, Puddle Jumper, Manchester, Stud Finder (FNG), Moonshine, Shrinkage, Renegade (FNG), Blackbox, Abacus (FNG), Kegger, Scrum (FNG), Delicious, Scar, DC2, Spandex (RESPECT), Mufasa (RESPECT), Stroller, Viking

The honor of Q-ing the first 2019 beatdown at The Gladiator was supposed to go to Manchester on 1/1/2019, but after the Alpha region patriarchs decided to do a convergence on 1/1, the honor fell to YHC: Viking. YHC had forgotten he had the Q (rookie mistake: didn’t put it in my calendar) and was reminded by Spandex’s Facebook post yesterday. After YHC showed some surprise to the Facebook reminder, Spandex quickly offered to cover the Q; but YHC knew this opportunity comes around, well, only once a year… so boots were laced up, last-minute planning commenced, whispers of FNG’s coming out of hiding occurred, and the Q-drenaline started rising.

No joke: Viking gets Q-drenaline every single time. It’s like that Virgin Q all over again. It may have been the nerves of not working out in the last 16 days, the worry of oversleeping, or the concern of messing up the cadence in front of THE CO-Q. These nightmares haunted Viking all night, who woke up about every hour. Viking even dreamed about the BLIMPS that were planned; in his dream, DC2 took over the BLIMPS and kicked Viking to the curb. Would Viking’s dream /nightmare come true? Would THE feared CO-Q take the realm at the first sign of weakness shown by YHC?

Viking sprung out of bed at 4:35, ready to prove the naysayers wrong. Viking’s first thought was “Stroller and Mufasa have probably already ran 2 miles by now.”

Cones were gathered, radar was checked (no rain!), poncho was still taken (backup plan was to activate YHC’s weather powers by wearing the poncho to ensure the rest of the PAX would stay dry), and the departure from Devonshire transpired.

Viking pulled into the parking lot around 5:05. There were a number of cars already parked, but no PAX in sight. Viking figured Mufasa and Stroller would come running out of the woods soon enough; seriously, you never know when a Mufasa might come running out of the bushes. I think East Roswell Park should start putting up Mufasa Crossing signs.

Viking quickly setup the cones on the fields, meticulously placing the cones at the exact, GPS-guided positions. Back to the flag to see a large amount (19) of PAX, including four FNG’s and one 2.0. The pressure was on; no turning back now.  Disclaimers were given. Moonshine came screeching in, and off we moseyed.


Viking wanted to take the PAX on a warmup mosey for 2,019 feet (approx .382 miles), but didn’t set his watch correctly at the start. Some improvising brought us up the hill to the Eves Road entrance, where the following exercises were performed:

20 – SSH
19 – MountainClimbers
20 – SSH
19 – Weed Pickers

Mosey back to the south “Pitch,” while doing toy soldiers, high-knees, karaoke, all while avoiding the police SUV that surely noticed us up on Eves Road.


Four stations were setup for BLIMPS x 4. YHC made the PAX air chair while giving instructions, as YHC hates to allow the PAX the pleasure of resting.  Each exercise was performed at each of the four stations (cones), with running in between each station. Once done with the first round, plank for the six; keep the group together! No play on “2019” numbers here; Just grueling pain and mumble chatter.

B – urpees (5 reps at each station)
L – unges (10 reps each leg at each station)
I – mperial Walkers (15 reps at each station)
M – erkins (20 reps at each station)
P – lank Jacks (25 reps at each station)
S – quats (30 reps at each station)

After squats, some Mary for the six. With 12 minutes left, YHC led the PAX to the north “Pitch,” where some more group fun was planned.

1st cone – 20 yards away,  run to it, and do 20 BBS
2nd cone – 19 yards away, run to it, and do 19 Buzzsaws
3rd cone – 20 yards away, run to it, and do 20 BBS
4th cone – 19 yards away, run to it, and do 19 Buzzsaws

The plan was to do 2 rounds of this with different exercises, but with four minutes left, YHC called the PAX over to the last set of cones. 2,019 inches, or 56.08333 yards, were marked off for Bear Crawl Indian Run style. It didn’t work out as well as planned (the PAX mutinied) as YHC should have split the PAX up into groups since space was limited… But the best quote of the morning came from Atari (Scar’s 13-year old 2.0), who yelled to the bear in front of him “Get your a$$ out of my face!”

Mosey back to the flag. It was 6:00 on YHC’s watch, but seeing an eager Scar ready to pounce, YHC allowed Scar to lead 1 Mary. YHC was internally proud of the fact that he had kept the PAX pretty dry all morning (no poncho was needed), which plays an integral indirect part to a happy M awaiting each PAX at home (less of a mess to clean up). Scar wanted nothing to do with those good internal feelings, as he led the PAX in some core exercise that resulted in the PAX’s butt and back getting soaked on the wet pavement. YHC can’t remember the exact exercise but can very well recall the bitterness swelling inside him towards Scar at that moment. Yes, I’m crying you a river.

In conclusion, serious props to Atari, who took the place of Laces and pushed Mufasa all morning.


-Four FNGs were welcomed and  named. The PAX (and the Q) must have New Year’s Resolutions to be more kind or something, as each person got a normal name. (Spandex was shaking his head the entire time.) Welcome Renegade, Abacus, Scrum, and Stud Finder!

-Prayers lifted for Brownie and the upcoming kidney surgery! Brownie is giving one of his kidneys to a friend/neighbor in need of a kidney.

-Q-Source gathering (3rd F) on Friday morning at 6:30 at the Chic-fil-a at The Avalon

-First Gladiator BD is this Saturday from 7:00-8:00. Kegger has the Q!

Leave a Comment